Rahul & Anjali (Kuch Kuch Hota Hai). In the film, Anjali waits a lifetime for Rahul to choose her. He only does so after she performs femininity correctly. 2026 Anjali ain’t got no time for that. She’d rethink her sexual identity, post about queerness, neurodivergence, basketball and MyMuse. She’d forget Rahul. He’d marry Tina and they’d name their daughter Samaira. Aman would take his green-flag energy elsewhere.
Jack & Rose (Titanic). A ship sinks, class rebellion passes for romance. Were the Titanic on her maiden voyage today, she would be a playground for tech-bro billionaires. Rose would hate being a nepo baby; Jack would be a laid-off underling. They’d hook up. But she’d have to sell her Heart of the Ocean to survive. Both would drift into influencer grift, later resurfacing as a Netflix true-crime episode on cultish radicals.
Ross & Rachel (Friends). In the ’90s, Ross handled romantic insecurity through grand gestures: Flowers and a string quartet at Rachel’s office. In 2026, he’d likely mark his territory by lovebombing her on Insta, leaving flame emojis on her every post, and bullying guys who DM’d her. It’s just as awful. Rachel would google What Is A Situationship? as her flight landed in Paris.
Munna & Mili (Rangeela). Imagine giving up a career in films for a Roadside Romeo. Can’t. In the 1995 hit, that’s what Mili did. Today she wouldn’t mistake jealousy for love. She’d go viral for her Rangeela Re song, and land brand collabs, film GRWMs, sign on with a content agency. She’d see Munna for the insufferable narc he is, and make his slut-shaming texts public. And she’d go viral again for How To Knot Your Denim Shirt.
Harry & Sally (When Harry Met Sally). No time for slowburns. Harry and Sally would have Tinder bios saying “not looking for anything serious,” swipe right on each other and hook up every few months. They’d never define the relationship, they’d just be each other’s booty call and Plus One for social occasions. They’d be emotionally exclusive until the thread went cold, the chats buried. Then, he’d ghost her.
Geet & Aditya (Jab We Met). Jab We Met sold the romance of a loud girl and a shy boy. But Geet was always delulu: Stalking Anshuman was her main gig. In 2026, that delusion would go online: Tarot reels, twin-flame posts, and heading to the mountains for “self-discovery”. When Aditya followed, she’d rebrand him as her real twin flame, and start a van-life channel together. Six months later, she’d discover attachment theory, call him avoidant, post a breakup vlog and board another train, in search of her “true twin flame”.
Christian & Anastasia (Fifty Shades of Grey). In 2026, Christian would find Anastasia on OnlyFans and fund her Dubai trips, yachts, and luxury hauls. He’d mistake access for control. She’d laugh. She’d set the terms, ration attention, and turn his desire into subscription tiers. Every spend would deepen his investment. The moment he asked for exclusivity, she’d cut him off. There’d still be BDSM, but on more even terms.
Heathcliff & Catherine (Wuthering Heights). The OG story framed Catherine and Heathcliff as a love so intense, it bordered on destructive. Today, that intensity would spill online. Catherine would post cryptic reels about toxic passion; Heathcliff would subtweet, and nurse grievances in public. Every fight would turn into screenshots, each jealous post triggering a counter-post. Followers would pick sides and reward escalation. Blocking and unblocking would replace reconciliation.
Mr. Darcy & Elizabeth Bennet (Pride & Prejudice). Jane Austen’s Darcy and Elizabeth meet in a room where social codes demand patience, restraint and reputation management. In 2026, they’d meet on Love Is Blind. Behind the wall, his entitlement would leak through pauses, corrections, and quiet mansplaining. Elizabeth, too independent, too chronically online to romanticise a mid man, would get the ick instantly. The love story goes flat before the Netherfield coffee rave even takes off.
Raj & Simran (Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge). They’d still meet on the Eurail, flirt, take pictures, but post them as #VacationFling. Tujhe Dekha Toh Yeh Jaana Sanam would play in a Reel, but ironically. At the end of the trip, Simran would choose Azerbaijan over Punjab, opting out of marriage entirely. Raj would channel his nostalgia into an app for meeting women while travelling, complete with guides on flirting across time zones. They’d monetise the memory and move on.
From HT Brunch, February 07, 2026
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