Don’t look up. A crisis is brewing. On one hand, we claim that a man’s height does not matter. Comedian Jaboukie Young-White coined the term Short Kings in 2018, and we’ve been using it as a celebratory term. Pop Culture Jeopardy! dedicated an entire category to Short Kings this year. We swoon over Bruno Mars and Daniel Radcliffe (both 5’5”) and K-drama hottie Im Si-wan (5’6”). When Tom Holland goes on talk shows and jokes about Zendaya having to catch him during Spider-Man stunts because her legs hit the ground first, we laugh. When Benny Blanco casually strolls past paparazzi while a towering Selena Gomez rocks four-inch heels, we heart the pictures. Short King Appreciation Day falls on June 21 (we missed it by a few inches!).
But in the real-world, most women want a male partner who can double up as a grandfather clock. A US study of Income Dynamics from 1999 to 2023, in which 9,000 families are interviewed every two years, suggests that in heterosexual couples, men continue to be the taller partner. Only 3.3% of couples had a taller woman. The tall-guy-short-girl trope is so old and so strong, official ’80s photos of Princess Diana and Prince Charles show him looming over her, when they were both the same height. Who approved this nonsense, Your Majesty?
There’s also the enduring myth that a few extra inches north suggests that there’s a few extra inches south. “And when you’re with someone who is physically bigger or taller, you might subconsciously feel safer or more protected,” says Mumbai-based economist Darshana Ramgiri, 25. In both cases, length is rarely a marker of a good partner.
Women on dating apps tend to set their filters for six feet or taller, ignoring the statistical reality that more than half of the global male population stands at 5’7” or shorter (and that only half of India’s male adults are 5’5” or taller). Subreddits such as r/OnlineDating or r/DatingAdvice are full of men expressing resentment over this. “I specify my height on my dating profile because it is a question women ask so often,” says Ozwin Pinto, 41, a 6 ft chef from Ireland.
Of course, it’s unfair. “Many short men go through insecurity at puberty because they’re constantly reminded that they’re ‘supposed’ to be taller,” says Siliguri-based IT professional Supratim Sarkar, 33, who stands 5’3”. But a study published by the American Psychological Association (APA) suggests that the classic “short man struggle” is often a case of conflict between men, not a rejection by women. Shorter men scored significantly higher on “intrasexual envy”, a polite term for carrying a massive chip on your shoulder around other dudes. Across Reddit threads, women repeatedly echo the same sentiment: They are happy to date shorter men, but are turned off by the bitter “height psychosis” and defensive anxiety that men come with.
Kunal Khemu (5’5”), Diljit Dosanjh, Dhanush, Vikrant Massey, and Rajkummar Rao (all 5’7”) regularly romance taller leading ladies with ease. But in the arranged-marriage market, the ads seeking grooms invariably list “towering stature” as a requirement for men.Bengaluru based creative professional Gayathri Menon, who is 5’8” says she’s dated men who were a couple of inches shorter. “I genuinely enjoyed being with them. But I often felt like a giant.” But even shorter women tend to reject men who match their own height.
Tall men readily admit that their advantage is superficial. “Being 6’4” has certainly been an advantage at times,” says engineering manager Jamie Lobo, 34, from Mumbai. “That said, personality, compatibility, and character are what determine whether a connection actually goes anywhere.” Women don’t want to look up to a man in a patriarchal sense. But if they want to look into a face that cares for them, they might consider looking down.
From HT Brunch, July 11, 2026
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